Saturday, May 28, 2011

So Very Honest.... And Extremely Grateful

Boy have I been a spoiled brat lately. Not that I would have listened to anyone if they would have told me so. I have been so over stressed with trying to find the perfect house, on top of balancing well.... life. It seems that some people can handle anything & everything that is thrown at them and do it with ease. Unfortunately I'm not one of those people.... Yet! I will get there.

Life doesn't come easy for me, yet I'm realizing that nothing worth having comes easy. Which means most everything I have has the highest value. I normally have a glass half empty type of outlook most days, But seriously how spoiled is that? I have a million things that God has given me that I overlook and take advantage of everyday. The home we have, The one I complain about having country water and being to small. Two healthy children, The ones that I say are on my last nerve by the end of some days. The amazing husband God blessed me with who loves his family to an extent that only God can grant. A great career for my husband that allows me to stay home and raise our girls up the right way, but that is also his passion and he does what he loves to do.

We put a second offer on a house that would be perfect for our family. But we only want it if it's in God's plan for our family (we hope it is =) But we are willing to wait as hard as it would be. We have looked at countless houses looking for a place that screams The Anzar Home to us. So far this is the 3rd house we have loved and the 1st two didn't work out. But we are going all in on this one & giving it all we have. 
Needless to say I'm pretty sure I have been a bundle of stressed out nerves that have manifested as cranky, short, negative, poor me Ashley. Not the person I want to be & I apologize to anyone who was affected by it.

So, I'm changing things. It won't be overnight, But I'm taking things one day at a time. Today i am only thinking of today. And tomorrow only tomorrow. And I think that if I CHOOSE to look at the glass half full EVERYDAY and give God his credit not only will my life be more enjoyable but my families will be too.
So as I sit here stopping and starting typing endlessly tonight due to a baby who is working on another 3 teeth   I will choose to not be stressed or over tired but be thankful that I have this time with her, because this will be the last few days I will ever get to see her sweet little gummy smile outside of a picture. Soon her teeth will be in and the gummy smile will be gone. I will miss that more than anyone can imagine. I am thankful for every minute I get with my girls and my best friend, My Bear, My Barrett.

Thank You Lord for loving me enough to give me such a great life. You have blessed me with so much that I could never even count the blessings. Please Lord I pray happiness, health, and sound minds for my family & I Lord. Please don't let us forget how great we have it and the many blessings you have given us.
In Jesus name

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. 
Romans 8:28

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